Poetry Thursday: Ash can't read good
Three Year Old Me with "Soft dog" and ugly shoesI'm starting to think I'm not exactly cut out for this Poetry Thursday crowd.
This week, they’re writing something about, um, "synaesthesia"? I can't pronounce that. Can't read it or spell it. I can't for the life of me figure out what the hell it is! "Synaesthesia." Sounds made-up to me...
Something about a feast, or a dinner party? As if I go to dinner parties...I eat dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets with a two year old! I'm lucky if I have a bit of conversation in the process. Usually something along the lines of, Don't throw your corndog on the floor. Yes, you can have the rest of mommy's mayonnaise sandwich. No, I don't want to "blah blah" my plate. (Sigh)
I'll make something else up, though, just for the sake of continued participation. God knows I'm not doing too well with the whole Sunday Scribblings thing. I've been writing for 'em, just not posting. No time for editing these days, but Poetry and editing don't mix anyway, so here goes nothing.
For the kids who can't read good...
Almost October
I walk into a life
Where I'm not wanted
She's not ready
For another child
I'm supposed to be a boy
That's what they told her
And here I am
Another daughter
For a father
Who's never home
I'll be the son I was meant to
Where blue carpet fills my room
Blue curtains
I'll go shirtless
And fishing
Take long rides in his GTO
I'll never be the girl they never wanted
The boy
The son
The disappointment of October
I'll keep going til they're happy I was born
8 comments:
such a cutie girl and i like those type of shoes (but hey i have no taste ;-))
it's difficult to imagine what our parents expected us to be, even when they make it as obvious as disappointment at our unexpected gender. your change in perspective shows this well. who knows what holes they expected us to fill?
i prefer to hang my expectations of life onto me, not my boys. harder on me because i'll have to try and do something with myself, but a whole lot easier on them. but maybe i'm just depriving them of the chance to make great poetry ;-)
x x x x x
Wow. You were a very pretty girl.
Such a sad poem...
You can go shirtless-fishing with me! Hehe.
Cute picture, and a great, sorrowful poem. I like "The disappointment of October" -- that could be the title, even. Cool, pathos-drenched poem, precious!
Daibh: Thanks, precious! :)
I'm glad you liked it.
...
BH: Thank you! :)
Yes, let's go fishing..."You and me going fishing in the dark. Lying on our backs and counting the stars. Where the cool grass grows."
I hope you like country music. ;)
...
BB: Thank you! :)
And yes, the shoes are cute...I was being critical yesterday. Distracted by the "synaesthesia", I think. ;)
"I prefer to hang my expectations of life onto me, not my boys."
I think that's great! And exactly what I plan to do too, with Baby Girl. :)
...
I hope everyone's well.
Happy Friday!
Love,
~ Ash
great, sad poem Ash.
I thought you would have jumped at synaesthesia...isn't that overlap of senses that are experienced? Or maybe I'm just smelling that ;) ha
Happy Friday indeed!
Heidi
Oh yes, my wife has the most common kind of synaesthesia: in her mind she sees letters in colour, and the association between individual letters and specific colours are fixed. I don't know the exact linkages in her case, but the way it works is that 'A' is always red, 'B' is white, etc. Words are also chromatic, taking on the colour of the dominant letter or letters (e.g. a word with lots of 'A's would also be red).
It used to confuse her mightily when she worked in a tearoom many years back making sandwiches. Since words starting with 'ch' are white, she'd frequently mix up orders for 'chicken' and 'cheese' sandwiches when rushed.
But enough about me. Your poem reached out to me, then into me, and squeezed my heart. Parental expectations can be horrendously damaging...
Beautiful poem. I have issues (with everything) with my parents and your words spoke to me. Sometimes I'm just so much what my mother wanted that I can't satisfy her without being eaten up. That is a sample of one of the many issues you've raised for me. Good poet.
[url=http://ivlkrwnnz.com]FZCEYpuPVdV[/url] , GXDaHhCN , http://yuxeflk.com
Post a Comment